Down and Down We Go, Or: Happy Schadenfreude Day!

I finally got a phone call from the conference center last night. You’ll never guess why they hadn’t contacted me! No really, guess:

1) The conference center had burned down in a freak accident involving a hot plate and a lemur.
2) My contact had been fired for forcing potential employees to work for free as a condition of their employment.
3) Someone claiming to be me had been showing up to work for the past two weeks and they were too lazy to tell the difference.
4) When my contact said “I’d like you to come in as soon as possible to meet with my boss and finalize the paperwork — but before we do that, I’d like you to come in for a couple of events as a testing period,” what she meant was “There are three other people who are still candidates for this job and I’m having them go through the same illegal procedure, so it’s going to be a while before you hear back from me.”

If you guessed #4, congratulations! Bonus points: She also sounded pissed off that I had been bugging her and her boss about the whole thing! Now, I’d like you to reflect on your life for a moment, really examine it, and consider this: At least you aren’t me.

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